Pretention

Taken When Jonty Had A Sneak Preview

Well Maxie’s left for London so it’s just me and Jonty in the house. So, as a special treat for him after work, I gave Jonty a preview of my new jewellery collection: Danger! High Voltage and even allowed him to model it for me!

As you can see Jonty is wearing a lovely black shirt by George at Asda, jeans by The Gap, a black cap that he got from his father Rodney and two pieces from the Danger! High Voltage collection!

I’m not keen on him wearing that cap, I think it distracts from the overall tone, and – if I’m honest – I think it makes him look like a workman.

Anyway I knew you’d love to see them too, so I took some photos of the collection for you. If you’d like to buy any of these amazing and unique pieces – which I know you will – they’re all on eBay, their links are under their inspirational descriptions.

This is the plug pendant that Jonty’s wearing today, I call it The Spark Of Love I got the idea while I was watching Jules Et Jim and Jonty was putting a new fuse in the toaster plug. The three prongs represent perfectly the love triangle in the film and the white of the plug housing symbolises virginity, being despoiled by the prongs thrusting forcefully into it.

Click here to buy The Spark Of Love on eBay now!

This is a bracelet made of fuses encased in cling film. I call it Dazed And ConFused. It’s a metaphor for safe sex – which as we all know is important for the poor, with all their diseases and what not.

The fuses represent the phallus and the cling-film a prophylactic sheath. I think this piece is one of my finest. Please note when you inevitably tell your friends about this piece, that its proper name is Dazed And ConFused, the mid-word capitalisation is very important.

Click here to buy Dazed And ConFused on eBay now!

Finally, this choker is both striking and beautiful, alluring yet deadly and is made from a kettle lead. I call it Power Struggle. The symbolism of this piece is that it represents interracial, homosexual relationships. If you look carefully you’ll see it too.

Two different plugs, one black, one white, separated by the cord of homophobia but at the same time joined together by the very same cord of homophobia! It’s genius isn’t it?

Click here to buy Power Struggle on eBay now!

I’m so talented it’s not true.

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